Why Do I Play Poker?

February 12, 2010

Full Tilt Poker – I Banned Myself

Filed under: Bad Beats, Full Tilt Poker, Poker — Tags: , , , , — WhyDoIPlayPoker @ 4:00 am

It used to be that I would put $100 in my FTP account and have a good time. Play a few sit-n-gos and win or lose, it was entertaining.

Wait, what the fuck am I saying? I NEVER and I mean NEVER have really felt that way. I am competitive to the bone and every fiber in my body always wants to win. $1, $5, $100, I don’t care. I want to be the best and I want to win. Ok, I got that off my chest.

So 2 days ago I put $100 into Full Tilt and got ready for some sit n go action.  First 2 go well, a first place and a third place. Then, I hit the skids. In the course of 2 hours, I played 6 multi table tournaments.  I play my usual game – tight early on, then open up as the blinds get higher in order to steal blinds, then when it gets to the bubble stage I either push or fold.  It usually comes down to coin flips and as everyone knows, you gotta win the flips if you’re gonna win the tourney.

I have come to accept that I am going to bust out before the money this way fairly often. It’s a bitter pill to swallow when it happens, but when I win the flips it is sweet perfection. This is a winning style of poker…..unless……

You lose every fucking coin flip.

You see, on this particular night I was running really well pre-flop. I was catching good cards, making the right folds and pushing when I had the best of it. Only problem was none of my hands would hold up. Don’t get me wrong, I am not crying bad beat here. It just sucked to be kicked in the balls over and over. I was at worst a 60/40 winner in 7 coin flip situations and didn’t win one of them. I got 2 outed, 3 outed and 4 outed over and over.

I’ll admit it. I titled. I steamed off $20 in a sit n go by pushing on the flop with a queen high flush draw. Of course I got called by the Ace high flush draw. Just one of those nights.

In the end, I realize that on line poker just isn’t for me. Call me crazy, but I did the most extreme thing I could think of.

I BANNED MYSELF FROM FTP, permanently.

Instead of donating money to undeserving poker players, I have decided the next time I want to waste $100 playing online poker, I’ll just send a check to Haiti and then go play with my son.  Better use of time. Better use of money.

I play ONLINE poker to remind myself to never again play online poker.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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February 9, 2010

Winning Poker – How to Crack the Code

Filed under: Poker, Texas Hold'em, WSOP — Tags: , , , — WhyDoIPlayPoker @ 4:00 am

I enjoy the process of figuring things out.  Puzzles make me feel alive. Get my brain swirling about in the best of ways.

You probably think I am going to say that poker is the biggest puzzle I have ever encountered. Not true.  That award goes to being a husband and father. Much harder AND much more rewarding.  But poker comes in second.

There is something so enticing about the puzzle that we call poker.  With all the books, discussion groups and casinos, there are literally thousands of avenues to explore that can you help you crack the code. Most of us have tried them all. So why aren’t more of us winning? As I’ve said before, I am not a winning poker player, so I often ask myself why I play?

To crack the code.

More than money, ego, bragging rights or that adrenaline rush of getting a one-outer on the river, I play poker simply to figure out what it takes to be a winner. What is that formula?

I keep a book of all my sessions:

When I play. For how long. What stakes. What game. Won/lost amount. Who I play against.

This book is a cryptic puzzle that I desperately want to figure out. Somewhere in those pages is the answer as to why I don’t win more money at poker.

Some of the answers are obvious: I play when I am tired. I play against better players. I go on tilt and give away my last $30 (did that last night!). I play too long. I play too loose when I am winning. I don’t leave when I am losing.

On closer look, I realize these are not results, but really symptoms. There is something deeper. Something within myself that prevents me from winning more money. Not sure what that is yet.

I just started reading a great book: The Secrets of the Millionaire Mind. It says that rich people think differently than poor people. This reminded of Alan Schoonmaker’s book, Poker Winners Are Different.

Both books imply that rich people and winners (in poker this is often the same thing) have different wiring in their brain.

If that’s the case, then I guess I need brain surgery. Now I need to figure out how to pay for that.

Maybe I’ll win the WSOP Main Event. A few million should cover the surgery, right?

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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February 5, 2010

Winning Poker Formula:Play Against the Weak. Losing Poker Formula:Play Against the Strong

Filed under: Commerce Casino, Full Tilt Poker, Hollywood Park, Poker, Texas Hold'em, The Bike — Tags: , , , , , , , — WhyDoIPlayPoker @ 4:00 am

I’ll just come out and say it: I play poker to win money.

Just like any other poker player, I will take money from my friends, my enemies, my neighbor, the fathers of my son’s pre-school friends and even my wife.  Hell, if my grandmother would sit down with me I would try my darnedest to take her money as well.

In order to win more money at poker, I have done what any true poker player does: study.

I study a lot.

I buy the books: Sit ‘n Go Strategy, Harrington on Hold ‘em, Online Ace, etc. I underline important parts, take notes and implement the techniques.

I take internet courses:  Deepstacks University, the online interactive course endorsed by Mike “The Mouth” Matusow. (great site by the way!)

I have discussions with fellow poker players about strategy, odds, etc.

You’d think with all this diligent work my results would be better.  Online I am a break even player. Home games:winner.  Casino games: loser. To be honest, I am an overall loser in poker. Not huge numbers, but enough to irk me. Make me want to crack the nut.

After all this studying, practicing and playing, I have come to realize there is only one REAL winning formula for poker: Play against players that are worse than you are.  Sounds simple, but it’s true. This is a predatory sport and the strong feast on the weak.

You want to beat the game, look for the table full of losers.

Top 10 Traits of a Losing Poker Player:

10.  He has a short stack. A good player knows that to win, his stack has to be replenished. Otherwise he’s not playing poker. It’s called playing bingo.

9. A big talker, giving lessons = BIG LOSER.

8. Looks like he’s been up all night. Probably trying to get even. Winners go home when they are losing and cut their losses.

7. Complains about back beats.

6. Goes to the ATM. Definitely means he is going beyond his intended budget and probably not using good bankroll management.

5. Plays almost every hand: loser

4. Tries to verbally intimidate the other players. LOSER!

3. Talks about how much he won last night. LOOOOOOO-SER!

2. Throws his cards at the dealer.

1. Makes quick over-sized bets.

I am probably not telling you anything new. But how many of us truly abide by these rules. It ain’t rocket science, but it works. In fact, it works way better than reading, studying or talking about poker. To paraphrase Texas Dolly: Poker is a game of people played with cards.

I play poker to win money from the weak.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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February 3, 2010

At first I thought I was playing poker.

Filed under: Poker — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — Why Do I Play Poker? @ 4:00 am

This post was going to start with me fuming on the car ride home after a dismal night at the casino.  But after a little reflection, I realized the bad night wasn’t the point, it was my bad thinking.

It started with me sitting at a $100 NLH game. There was this drunk guy, so drunk the dealer had to help him count his chips drunk. He was sitting in front of a pile of chips and raising every, and I mean every, hand.  It looked like easy money.  In a pronounced slur, he would tell anybody who listened that he had racked up over a $1000 in less than half an hour.

It was obvious this guy wasn’t walking out of the casino with one dime of this money.  I figured, why not be a pal and help him part with it.  Why wait for a great hand? This guy’s drunk, why not help myself?

I pick up a very marginal hand. It’s an insta-fold against anyone but this guy. He raises and I’m happy to get it all in.  He’s happy to call.

I have him dominated.  He catches.  Re-buy. No big deal.

Soon, I’m against him heads up again.  He puts in his auto-raise.   Once again, I figure I’m ahead and I call.  Turns out I’m right again, but moments later,  I’m out another buy-in.

This happens a few more times.

Getting the picture?  Of course you do. At first glance, I was outraged I wasn’t winning.  But then I started thinking about it.  I may have known where I was, but truthfully I was barely ahead. At best, no more than 70/30.

I never considered there was a good chance I could lose four times in a row.  In my excitement to take down the King of Coronas, I didn’t factor in the grim reality:  he had the chips to weather the storm and I didn’t.

Big mistake.

So now I realize that I didn’t even play poker that night.  I gambled on a few expensive coin flips.

And from now on, that’s not why I play poker.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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January 31, 2010

Poker Optimism – Number 1 Sign of a Losing Poker Player

Filed under: Commerce Casino, Poker, Texas Hold'em — Tags: , , , , , , , — Why Do I Play Poker? @ 9:28 am

Everyone loves an optimist.  Their enthusiasm is contagious.  They’re go-getters.

You know what?  I’ve had an assload of optimists lately.  And truthfully, the only place I want to see them is at the poker tables. Preferably, with their optimistic fucking mouths shut.

Here’s why? They’ll optimistically go to the ATM machine way more times than they’ll make that miracle one -outer.

If it’s so easy, then why do I sound so mad?  Thanks for asking. I get tired of hearing how optimism and enthusiasm are the be all end all of everything.  Everyone thinks those qualities are great. What about their cousins greed and self-delusion?  Well, they’re connected.  Alan Schoonmaker, Ph.D, put it best in his book, “Your Worst Poker Enemy“- “Destructive emotion #1: Hope”

Here’s the big secret.  Poker is really about things not happening.   Top pair on the flop usually holds up.  Make all the optimists pay dearly for their sunny outlooks.

Don’t get me wrong, I have my optimistic moments.  I’m basically a long term optimist, short term pessimist. Both in poker and in life.

I play poker to watch the optimists drown in their own hope.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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January 30, 2010

Free Online Poker – a safe way to be on full tilt

Filed under: Bad Beats, Full Tilt Poker, Online Poker, Poker — Tags: , , , , , , — WhyDoIPlayPoker @ 9:01 am

I am not a fan of free poker. It’s an oxymoron. Poker by its very definition needs to be played for money. If it doesn’t hurt to lose, it’s not poker.

That said, I have come to realize there is a time and place for the free online game.

In order to win in poker, you have to be controlled, disciplined, smart and lucky. As we all know, you can be at the top of your game, do everything right, and still lose. That’s one of the most frustrating things about poker. Do everything right, but still lose.

After a week’s worth of losing, either due to bad playing (probably) or bad beats (unlikely) I really want to say “fuck it” to good play.  This discipline, control and smart play hasn’t gotten me anywhere, so I think.

Enter FREE ONLINE POKER.

Talk about going all in with impunity. This is the place. 9-2 off UTG, sure. All in. Flop is A-A-K and I have pocket deuces. Fuck it. ALL IN!

This is where I go when I just can’t take it anymore. I can act like a jack ass. Push with junk. Call with junk. Act like a donkey. I get all of this out of my system. Welcome to the donkey farm.

Truthfully, I’m not happy until until at least six people are wishing cancer on me in the chat window. “What?  You want to play real poker? Get two nickels to rub together, assholes!”  I’m here for a purpose. This is free poker and I’m going all in every hand until I damn well feel and or play better.

Besides, I don’t feel as bad making a bunch of jerks hate me as I do after kicking the dog or punching a wall.  Ouch.  For the record, I never punched my dog. I did call him a douchebag once.

After 15 minutes of being this poker maniac, I feel better. The best part is I worked out some frustration and my bankroll is still intact.

I occasionally play free on-line poker to shake off the shit and stress from my real game.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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January 29, 2010

Full Tilt’s Rush Poker – A lesson in focus…..I think.

Filed under: Full Tilt Poker, Online Poker, Poker, Texas Hold'em — Tags: , , , , , , , — Why Do I Play Poker? @ 5:00 am

I wish I could tell you a surefire strategy to beat the online poker site’s new game.  But I can’t.  Not even close. I have no idea how to win in that game.  I think it starts with a raise and then I’m not sure where to go from there. Maybe a little patience might give you a leg up.  What do I know?  I’ve logged in for forty five minutes and played more hands than my first six months of poker combined.

The thing that hit me most about Full Tilt’s Rush poker is how important it is not to look back.  In Rush, there is no way to see how the hand would’ve ended.  You’re whisked away to another table.  You have a new decision to make. You don’t have time to think about what went right or wrong in the last hand.

Unlike regular poker, in Rush there is no “What if?” because the hand really doesn’t exist anymore. There’s not even a way to see “What if?” Actually, this is great, because if there ever were a shitty game, it’s  ”What if?”   It’s a subtle variation on the timeless classic “Would’ve, should’ve, could’ve.” Actually, it’s the same game with a different title.  Kinda like playing NYC Monopoly or Grateful Dead Monopoly.  Same game, different theme.

Now I’m not saying there isn’t a place for reflection about your game or your life.  It’s essential.  Just not at the table.

I always have to remember to be in the moment at the poker table. That’s the only thing that matters right now. Who cares if my KQ would have made a straight? Thinking about it only distracts me from the hand at hand. It’s a recipe to compound my losses or, if I’m basking in the glory of an amazing play, minimize my wins.

So I’m going to keep playing Rush. Stay focused and try to avoid writing blog posts while I’m doing it.  Because at  300 hands an hour, it’s damn near impossible.

I play poker to help me stay focused in the present.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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January 27, 2010

Poker Therapy

Filed under: Home Game, Online Poker, Poker, Winning Streak — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — Why Do I Play Poker? @ 11:05 am

In elementary school I got beat up everyday by Jarett Moore. We were about the same size, but for some reason when he picked on me, I wouldn’t fight back.

Thirty years later the sense of shame for never fighting back is still palpable. Actually, it’s embarrassing and haunting. The only comfort I have in these memories is that by not fighting back I probably avoided living my life with a limp. Had I somehow managed to level Jarett, his brother or one of his 57 cousins would have removed my head and shat down my throat. R.I.P.

After thirty years on the shrink’s couch, I have finally learned to stand up for myself, though sometimes my timing is bad. Whenever there is a bully at the poker table, I always have the same knee jerk reaction: you’re not going to push me around. This is great when I have the nuts, but when I am on a stone cold bluff and Joe Bully re-raises, this reaction is a recipe for disaster.

Problem is, I never believe people’s bets. My rational brain thinks there is a chance I am beat, but my alligator brain says, EAT THAT FISH. You see, I have this gift. With 99% accuracy, I can mistakenly think someone is bullying me when they are not.

I realize that the poker table is a very expensive and completely unsympathetic place to work out my childhood turmoils. When I am feeling strong, I look for and attack the poor suckers who have the tell tale signs of being in poker therapy. And yet some nights my childhood gets the better of me. I am the sucker and have a very expensive poker therapy session.

You’d think by now I would pick a new place to work this out, but I have come to terms with the fact that from time to time I will find sadistic comfort in being picked on. I guess I am addicted to the rush of confrontation and the challenge of standing up to the bully. Even if the only person I am fighting with is myself.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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January 25, 2010

Like Dexter, I also have a “Dark Passenger.”

Filed under: Commerce Casino, Hollywood Park, Poker, Texas Hold'em, The Bike, WSOP, Winning Streak — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — Why Do I Play Poker? @ 4:00 am

“I’m all in!”

“I call!”

He shows me his straight. I muck my 2 pair in disgust. It’s not that I got outplayed. That doesn’t piss me off too much. What DOES piss me off is when I make a solid game plan on the way to the casino, but when I get there, my dark passenger takes over and the game plan goes out the door. It’s like I am two people. On the one hand, I am a responsible father and husband. Patient, creative and frugal. On the other hand, I am an aggressive poker player – impatient, impulsive and sometimes reckless.

Okay, maybe my comparison to Dexter is an exaggeration. After all, its been years since I hacked up some evil dude and threw his body parts in the ocean.

I have the same conversation every time I go to the casino. “Today I am going to play tight. No fishing. Only play position. Fold draws when I don’t have the odds. Go home when I lose my edge. Don’t go on tilt when I get a bad beat. And most importantly, FOLD WHEN I KNOW I AM BEAT!” I look in the mirror. Remind myself that I am in control.

Then I get to the casino, fast walk to the felt and plop down my chips and eagerly await my first Christmas present. 2 minutes later, all my chips are in the middle. 3 way action and I am on the nut flush draw on the flop. I almost have odds and convince myself this is a good spot to get it all in. 30 seconds later…..I am on tilt, calling for chips and ready to gamble. Just like that, enter my dark passenger. It doesn’t take long until, I have lost my second buy-in. At this point, I look at my phone and realize I have been here for only 75 minutes. Luckily the wallpaper on my iPhone is a picture of my son. Instantly I snap back. My horns retract, my fangs retreat, my tail disappears and I am myself again. I breath deeply and remind myself that I am not defined by my last hand of poker.

I am always surprised when my dark side comes out, but I have come to be grateful for him as well. I use him as a measure for my personal growth. The day I can take a beating and shake it off will be the day I have made it to the next level of consciousness. It may sound a bit metaphysical, but that’s one of the reasons I play poker.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

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January 24, 2010

Some things don’t go well together. Connectivity and sit-n-go bubble strategy come to mind.

Filed under: Bad Beats, Full Tilt Poker, Online Poker, Poker, Texas Hold'em — Tags: , , , , , , , , , — Why Do I Play Poker? @ 4:00 am

There have been all sorts of things that keep me from playing my best poker online.   Mad at my boss.  Looking at too much porn. You get the picture.

Well, the other night was the first time my computer got the best of me.

I played a $24  + $2 Turbo 90 person tourney with a KO bonus of $4 per victim.  What the hell?  Seemed like fun.

Well, It was fun until I started getting disconnected every other hand.

Frustrated, I tried to dump my chips with A2 under the gun but I spiked an ace and knocked out my opponent. My first KO bonus. $4.  Cool.

I get disconnected again.  And again. And again.

I reconnect  and to my surprise I have aces and action.  Two guys are going all in.  It’s my turn to act.  My hand gets automatically folded.

Fuck.

Fuck you computer!  They would have held up too.  I would be the chip leader by a fucking mile.

I’m pissed. You have to take advantage of those spots.

We’re getting close to the bubble.  The guy I would have knocked out pushes.  He has me covered.  I have KK. We’re really close to the bubble, what to do?

I don’t have to tell you what happened .

Okay, I will. Out on the bubble.

I could’ve of waited, but I thought I was owed one because of those aces.  Where are my extra 40K in chips? I played like I had a rain check for a big winning hand.

It doesn’t work that way.  I let my computer put me on tilt. Sure, it sucked that I was having connectivity issues.  But I should have to reminded myself that my strategy for the end of the tournament had nothing to do with my connectivity issues.  Irrationally, I thought I had one in the bank. And I didn’t. Even though it felt good to blame my computer, it had nothing to do with why I lost that tournament.

I play poker is for the big scores.  It just eluded me last night.

Why do you play? Let me know at stories@whydoiplaypoker.net

P.S. I played another one the next night and pulled a 4th.  I’ll take $200 in profit. Gotta love the KO Bounty paying your buy in. No connectivity issues either.

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